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　　标题：TheLifeChangingMagicofHelpingKidsGetOrganized
　　source：psychologytoday丨byWendyParis
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　　Iopposedallscreentimewhenmysonwasatoddler，butaftermyhusbandmovedout，Irelented。Specifically，IletourearlyrisingsonwatchFiremanSaminthemorningwhileIsatinbedinatorporwithmyfirstcupofcoffee。
　　Twoyearslater，whenwemovedtoLosAngeles，FiremanSamcametoo。MysoncontinuedwatchinghimsavetheaccidentproneresidentsofPontyPantyearlymorningsfromourpostoutwest。Ihadn’tenvisionedaparentingplansoinclusiveofananimatedfirefighterfromWales，andlatersomecrazypurplepuffballmasqueradingasachicken，butmysonlovedthem。
　　Establishingroutines，evenaroundleisureactivitiessuchasa（marginally）educationaltelevisionshowpromotingpositivevalues，canhelpcreatecontinuityandasenseofstability。Stabilitymattersforchildren。Knowingwhathappenswhentranslatesintoconfidenceandsecurity，asenseofefficacyandcontrol。
　　Creatingstabilitycantakeextraeffortifyoumove，aswedid，orifyourchildrelocatesfromhousetohouseeachweek。Butdivorcealsoisagreattimetoteachkidshelpfulorganizationskills。Notsoorganizedyourself？Youcanusethefactofyourdivorceasmotivationtolearn。
　　FiveWaystoControlChaos
　　EstablishRoutinesAroundPositiveMoments
　　Weknowthatahomeworkroutinehelpskidsbuildgoodworkhabits；schedulingregulartimesforfunhelpsdefinetheshapeoftheweekandreinforcesthefactthatyourlivesareaboutmorethandivorce。Italsohelpsensureyoullcreatepositivemoments，oneofmyPrinciplesofParting（linkisexternal）。
　　IletmysonwatchTVfor30minuteseverymorning。Moreactive，regularlyscheduledrecreationssuchastennislessons，gardening，religiousservices，cookingordiningwithfriendsareothereasywaystocreatepositiveroutines。
　　PutEverythingInItsPlace
　　ManyolderkidsIspoketosaidtheylovehavingtwohomesingeneral，butdislikeconstantlymisplacingclothesandbooksastheymovefromplacetoplace。Evennow，Ilosestuffinmyhouse，butIdon’tknowwhichhouseIlostitin，saidahighschoolseniorinNewYorkwhoseparentshavebeendivorcedsinceshewasfour，andlivewithinwalkingdistanceofeachother。
　　Identifyaregularlocationforyourchildren’sclothes，booksandtoysandmakesuretheyusethem。ProfessionalorganizerJulieMorgenstern，authorofOrganizingfromtheInsideOut（linkisexternal）andOrganizingfromtheInsideOutforTeens（linkisexternal），recommendsthekindergartenclassroomapproachtohomeorganization。Inkindergarten，thecoloringareaisinonepartoftheroom，dressupinanother。Inahouse，youcanalsoestablishactivityzones。Coatsgointhecoatcloset，schoolsuppliesonthedesk，wetbathingsuitsonthehookinthebathroom。
　　UnpackImmediately
　　Onceyouidentifywhereyourchildrensitemsgo，createaroutineofunpackingimmediately，andputtingeverythinginitsplace。TheManhattanteentoldmeshe’ddragherstufffromplacetoplaceinabigbag，nevergetaroundtounpacking，andthenforgetwhichitemswereinwhichbaginwhichhome。Youcanmakearoutineoutofputtingawayyourchildren’spossessions，andusetheoccasiontohelpthemreconnectwiththeirsenseofhomeatyourplace。
　　I’vewrittenabouthowunpackingquicklycanhelpadultsfeelsettled（linkisexternal）aftermoving；thesameistrueforkidswhorelocatefromhousetohouseeachweek。
　　InvestinDuplicateCopies
　　Parentingintwoplacescangofarmoresmoothlyifyousplurgeonanextracopyofbooks，pajamasandotheressentialsthatareeasytomisplace。Here’soneareawherespendingalittlecangoalongwaytowarddecreasingconflictanotherimportantpartofhelpingkidsflourish。Ifyourexconstantlylosesyourson’sclothes，it’slessemotionallycostlytoinvestinextrashortsthantoconstantlyfightovermissingitems。
　　Manyolderkidslugaroundhalfdozenheavytextbookseachweek。Havingasetateachplaceprotectstheirbacksandprovidesitsownsecuritytheyknowthattheycancompletetheirassignments，regardlessofwhichhousethey’reinthatnight。
　　ConsideranOrganizationalApporOnlineCalendar
　　Stayingorganizedyourselfcansmoothtransitionsforyourchildren。Usetechnologytohelpkeeptrackofschedules，playdates，contactsandschoolprojects。SomeadultsuseaGoogleDocoranonlinecoparentingsitetocoordinatewiththeirchild’sotherparent。
　　DivorcedmotheroftwoTraciWhitneywentonestepfurther。Traciwantedoneplacetorecordexpenses，exchangenoteswithherofttravelingexandsharedoctor’snumbersandphotos。In2012，shelaunchedTwohappyhomes。com，aperky，upbeatsitethathelpsorganizethemassiveproductionthatischildhoodtoday。Igetalongwithmyexfine，butthere’ssomuchinformationthatyouhavetoshare，andifyoudoitintwohouseholds，it’smuchharder，shesaid。
　　Havingyourchildrenliveintwohomeswasprobablynotyouridealvisionfortheirhomelife。Butaswithsomuchindivorce，thechallengeisalsoanopportunitytodevelopvaluableskillsthatwillimproveyourlifeandtheirs，nowandinthefuture。